Tiny-little-practices-that-make-a-difference — Fostering . . .

Here is the second in a series of tiny-little-practices-that-make-a-difference.

Now that things are opening up, what is it that you want to foster?

To Foster: Derived from the old English verb fōstrian meaning to nourish, the current dictionary definition reads: To promote the growth or development of; to further encourage and affirm.

Transitioning into a new normal is an opportunity to be conscious about where we put our attention and energy. Fostering is a remarkably powerful human activity that we invest wisely, or otherwise, depending on how intentional we are. Fostering is at the heart of mentoring, teaching, parenting, creative endeavors, and any good leadership. (There are times that we might catch ourselves fostering a negativity in our lives that is giving rise to hardship and struggle . . .)

Here are some reflection questions to consider:

What is it that you are fostering these days? 

To what do I give encouragement through my actions?

To whom do I give encouragement and affirmation? 

Looking over your responses to these last two questions . . .

How in alignment with my deepest longings is my fostering activity?

Are there any energy leaks or distractions I feel the need to address?

Are there any shifts or changes I would like to make in my fostering activities? 

Daily questions to carry forward:

What would I like to foster or encourage today? What simple action might this require?

Who needs my affirmation and encouragement? In what way can I offer it?

Where can I go for the affirmation and encouragement I need to stay connected to the golden threads in the tapestry of my life? 

And here is a poem that I hope will offer encouragement as you pick up this tiny little practice . . .

It Is I Who Must Begin
- Václav Havel

It is I who must begin.
Once I begin, once I try —
here and now,
right where I am,
not excusing myself
by saying things
would be easier elsewhere,
without grand speeches and
ostentatious gestures,
but all the more persistently
— to live in harmony
with the "voice of Being," as I
understand it within myself
— as soon as I begin that,
I suddenly discover,
to my surprise, that
I am neither the only one,
nor the first,
nor the most important one
to have set out
upon that road.

Whether all is really lost
or not depends entirely on
whether or not I am lost.

Great Questions

Great questions spring from the mouths of babes. . .

One afternoon, way back when I was a young mother, I was busy putting groceries away and thinking about making dinner when my 7 year old daughter, Sara, burst into the kitchen with a burning question, “Hey Mom! What I want to know is, how come God doesn’t talk to me the way he talked to Noah?”  I knew it was a burning question because of her wide stance and the way she had her hands on her hips. I found out later that her teacher had just read Noah's Ark to the class in school that day.

My first response was internal, ‘Damn, he never talks to me the way he talked to Noah, either!’ Then I managed to slow down and stop bustling around in the kitchen. We had a talk about the Bible's booming voice of God and I started to articulate for her, and for myself, the many ways that God "speaks" to us.  Sara’s question has reverberated in my life for years. I’m so grateful that she asked it and that I stopped long enough to listen. For the life of me I can’t remember what I cooked for dinner that night.

Initially, Sara’s question roused me to examine the masculine voice of God that so often prevails my western Judeo-Christian lineage. Her question was what prodded me into discovering the feminine face of God. It led me to wondering, ‘How is it that we just Know? What senses inform me? How accurate is my interpretation of what I intuit? How can I tell? How could I have missed that? From where do I feel enough certainty to act?’ Since that day you could say I’ve been on a quest to “listen” (active mode) and to “hear” (receptive mode) more, better.

Eventually it led me to my interest in leadership.  In graduate school and subsequent trainings I specialized in the nature of creativity, innovation and emergence and the multifaceted aspects of what constitutes authority. Now the focus has evolved into seeing how Noah’s brilliant response to massive flooding is a story about a leader who innovated because he had a glimpse of the highest future and he managed to act on it. All of this lofty business translates directly into practical application in my daily coaching and facilitation practice. Yes! Now almost thirty years later, I can trace all that back to my little girl’s great question. And I'm still, always, honing my listening skills.

Great questions. They show up in our lives in the darnedest places, when we least expect them. The trick is to recognize them and to open to letting them reverberate and inform us. Tracing the reverberation can reveal the narrative of your life and give you a strong glimpse of what is calling you forward.

What is calling you forward?

What might you need to let go of to move toward that calling?

What action will it require?

What joy will it bring?

When questions like these start to burn in you, contact me.  I can help you cross into the next chapter of your adventure.

Entrepreneurship

The rewards of truly successful entrepreneurship are freedom and fullness of a high order.

Striving for excellence. Fulfilling your promise. Maintaining forward motion on a daily basis. Like leadership, entrepreneurship requires that we trust in our expertise while maintaining a steadfast commitment to the learning curve. Entrepreneurship requires a relentlessly high level of engagement. There is an “it is all up to you” quality to running a business that insists that we continually develop many aspects of ourselves. Entrepreneurial success resides in being versatile and expert. It is by nature a risky proposition that demands we approach life with an everyday courage; it constantly challenges our ability to be aware and stay a purposeful course.

Entrepreneurs call a coach into their corner to help them to fill this tall order. Bill Gates, in his May 2013 TED Talk, expressed an idea held in common by many of our nations most successful entrepreneurs: “Everybody needs a coach. They give us feedback and help us improve our practice.” As I see it, entrepreneurship is indeed a practice—it could even be described as a set of business and personal practices—and to sustain success, it requires a commitment to self-development.

Each of my clients arrives with challenges that set the trajectory for the coaching program that I then design specifically for them. As they “work” the program, they develop new approaches and capacities, deeply practical and sometimes transformational in nature, to the challenges they face. I offer an integral perspective—one that is balanced, comprehensive, interconnected, and whole. As my client, you will find much needed support in the coaching relationship. You will have someone with whom you can think things through, someone who knows the territory of running a business and self-development, who keeps your confidence, and is on your side. You will learn how to uphold the critical work-rest-play balance more effectively in the face of urgency. Some results that entrepreneurs have come to expect from working with me are an increased ability to:

• Envision creatively

• Act strategically

• Hold and position the value of their product or service

• Create effective structure and business practices

• Know when to let go and when to hold fast

• Connect more effectively with others

• Deliver on intent

• Create value for their stakeholders

At the outset, allotting the time and money for coaching feels like a leap, and may even appear to be a luxury. Upon completion of a successful coaching program, it is invariably seen as an essential investment.

Leading With Grit and Grace

In the field of Leadership, the rise of the feminine is causing a deep rumble. Emotional intelligence is gaining perceived value. Communication skills, and the capacity to build shared meaning and purpose in our places of work, are more widely recognized as critical to success. Women are taking up leadership more firmly, with more compassion and more radiance than ever before.

We are “leaning in” at work, as Sheryl Sandberg describes, and we are still carrying the lion’s share of responsibility for the quality of life for our families. “A record 40 percent of all households with children under the age of 18 include mothers who are either the sole or primary source of income for the family,” the Pew Research Center reported in May of 2013, as it released data that certainly won’t surprise many Americans but underscores some dramatic shifts over recent decades.The juggling act that each of us performs in our own private lives is actually a societal and cultural developmental edge. We are on the front lines of a massive experiment in life with less-clearly defined gender roles; the stakes are high, the gains and the losses are very real, and there doesn’t appear to be any going back.

Particularly when working with women, I help them to step forward into the challenge of this experiment in their work and personal lives. Using developmental models, I map out the stages of life and help you to find your place so that you can broaden your perspective on the unfolding narrative. With current and ancient wisdom concerning the masculine and feminine applied to leadership theory, I help you hone your directive/assertive and supportive/receptive aspects and to bring them into a powerful balance. I point you in the direction of what is essential and true to you. While I draw on the successes and failures of my own life, I rely on Integral methodology and many years of research and personal development to help women find their way.

• How do you navigate the demands of your work and personal life without succumbing to Superwoman Syndrome?

• How effectively do you stand up for what you know?

• Do you know when to stand down?

• How tenacious is your follow through?

• Does being authentic and strategic feel at odds to you?

• What do you listen for?

• Do you know how and when to give direction and support?

• Are you able to initiate and foster real and fruitful dialogue?

• How much quiet do you allow yourself?

• Have you discovered the value of silence?

Together we explore questions such as these along with the specific ones you bring to the table.

Together we hold the paradoxes until the contradictions begin to shift and wane, giving rise to the opportunity for transformation.

Together we discover more and more about your leadership style, and what is essential to you; we build your capacity to lead your life with grace and grit.