Here is a practice to develop your grit. I love this practice for getting engaged in what is meaningful, reducing brain fog, and wrestling effectively with the tyranny-of-the-lists. Choose the one fucking thing . . . and then hold yourself accountable to doing that thing—earlier is better than later.
Yes, I’m swearing here to call in your warrior aspect. I revel in the way using this word can unleash a spurt of empowering anger, as long as it is not overused in our everyday language. (I used to say to my kids when they would start to sling swear words around willy-nilly, “Save the swear words for when you need the emphasis.”) The sword-like quality of good clean anger is a great ally when being decisive and getting things done is called for.
While sipping your morning coffee or tea, scan out across all the ways that your life is calling to you and then ask yourself, “If all else takes over and my day gets away from me, What is the one fucking thing I’m going to do today?”
Criteria for determining your one fucking thing:
First and foremost — Make it small and doable. For the purposes of this practice, don’t choose a whole fucking project. Then fulfill two of the criteria below:
It falls into the important but not necessarily urgent category
It furthers something you care deeply about
Accomplishing it will give your spirits a lift
It will make things better later
Perhaps you have been avoiding it and therefore it is weighing you down
It is fun and you aren’t allowing it for yourself
A great addition to this practice is to find a trusted friend who will gently or fervently ask you, “What is your one fucking thing today?” This also makes it more fun!
If you are living under the tyranny-of-the-lists, and you’re up for a radical move, try tucking your list away for a few days or a week, and just focus on the one fucking thing. Once you get the hang of identifying your one fucking thing, you will most likely find that it has an almost magical quality. In systems theory it is referred to as a strange attractor, it generates engagement and a flow that will allow you to intuitively accomplish what you are using those lists to manage. Three things to do today and then the one fucking thing, is the task management system that has allowed me to enjoy being an entrepreneur, after years of living and working less successfully under the tyranny-of-the-lists.
My one fucking thing for today is to get this blog post completed. I plan to celebrate this accomplishment by taking my four fabulous grandchildren to build sandcastles at the beach.
Oh and the next tiny little practice is celebration . . .
Wolf and Woman
- Nikita Gill
Some days
I am more wolf than woman
And I am still learning
how to stop apologizing
For my wild